17/9 知足
Thursday, September 17, 2015 | 9/17/2015 03:01:00 PM | 0 comments
(Chose this video instead of e official one cos I love the clouds hehe but you can watch the official vevo video too it has a nice short story to it (: )
If anyone here caught the last episode of 中国好声音/ the voice of China, you'd probably have heard 赵大格 sing this song ^ by Yael Naim.
It's my new favourite song that I play on loop at least 20x / day and I have a feeling that I won't ever get sick of it (-:
It's a very very, very happy song and the 3 things I love about it are:
1. I'm bad with lyrics but half the song's La-s so I can La happily away
2. The song makes me feel like dancing; like Bob head side step swing a little you feel? (-:
3. If the music was an attitude, a personality or even a person, it would be The ideal attitude I would wanna take on life; or a personality that I would model after/ love to be (-: or at least if I can't be it I would wanna know someone who has a character like this music/ it's instrumentals. I can't put that into words. Too cool for cooldeline.
and I guess Zhao Dage with her personality and charisma performing this also made me fall in love with this song instantaneously (:
recently (not that recent) I found out that someone related to me by blood who supposedly loves food loves supper and all that / has many friends who jio her to eat good food actually really hates eating?? Like she doesn't eat anything after 8pm and she skips bf (then someone else in my family would scold her for not taking fruits or BF) and she'll be like "I'm so fat omg need to stop eating" (unconvinced that fruits and BF are the wrong meals to miss) but goes out for supper with friends like she loves food and I'm just like......
sorry I really cannot control it/ my insides feel dam uncomfortable when people lie or act dam fake i think this person isn't as gross as I make her sound like
But maybe society's really like that?? Idk it's so scary
Dear friends / closer ones, I hope yall don't act like that ahahahah
If you do, I'll judge you.
......
....
...
..
Then love you afterwards.
Haha. Yes I don't think anyone is perfect and I know everyone has flaws but I would really appreciate friendships more when people don't give me double sides (we're Not Hannah Montana). Just be yourself and I'll judge you maybe (confirm for lyj) but I'll still love you with all your flaws (: and I'll help you love yourself for who you are.
HAHAHAHAHA ok ignore that that was rubbish
Ok maybe not.
I guess thats partial truth cos that's me too I wanna be able to be myself in front of friends not be someone I'm not? freaking uncomfortable to do so yikes.
That's what friends are for.
(And then I bring in a quote to attempt to link and make my thesis/ hook relevant to the other parts of my essay hahaha)
Like Yael Naim sings in New Soul,
"I'm a young soul
in this very strange world
Hoping I could learn abit
bout what is true and fake.
(Irrelevant but let me) La la la la, lalalalalala, lalalalala, lalala, lalala."
I think for our age people have different sides (including myself) for many reasons but mainly cos we wanna hide a side of ourselves that we think others won't like? Or at least that's the case for me so I hope my friends won't do that cos I'll love every part of you (I sound like an obsessed stalker/fan) and I'll be sad if you think I won't like you.
But I think as we grow up we'll learn that in society being true and fake is a strategy or sth more- isit? Idk what people betray their true selves for yet though but guessing money or fame? none of which I have or will ever have but issok will never want to have those over myself I'm gr8/enough.
(Look at that growing ego/ narcissism wow I need to maintain HAHAHA )
((And a few days ago I was still wondering how it feels like to be pretty and slim and well liked and to be somebody/ feeling v sad LOL really got split personality))
Speaking of personality, I did this really random online test which shows you a series of pictures and asks you the object you see first. Eg like an image has an old woman, a young woman, a dog and a face or sth but you'll see one first and you pick that. Here's the context: if you were my fb friend since pri sch you'd see how I used to do 20-30 online quizzes/ day to find out my personality HAHAH crazy times. But anw, though I've grown up and realized my personality is not determined by quizzes, I think the results (especially towards the end) pretty accurately reflect my feelings/inner state now??
(Edit: this header is too retarded I need a "WOw thanks that was Really insightful!")
Moving on!
If you've been watching my stories on SC, you'd realize that I've started growing....
Sunflowers! (-:
Yes. I really wanted to share this (-:
Initially, I wanted to buy real ones but I hate the fact that they would die v quickly (the botanist/gardener said 1week after bloom) so I was ok w fake ones but I don't like fake stuff (quite ew) so my dad said I could grow some myself!!! and I bought a packet of 20 seeds hehe! On Election Day after we had Macs for bf :p Super excited (you can tell from how my words are starting to get jumbled and I can't stop ranting on and it's a sign of bad English) though I've only tried growing 5 seeds and currently only 2 have sprouted )-: The flowers would take 60 days to bloom and I was thinking if things worked well I could give them to the close friends as encouragement when they bloom during As! (-: (but yeah things not looking that great now only got two LOL) at the same time it'd be motivation for me to work hard while my seeds grow well and hard :p
And yeah I'm pretty touched my parents actually took me seriously (for once!!!) like allowing me to buy a baby pot and even the pot base HEHE and (organic) soil!!! Like at first my mean dad was telling me to go steal soil from our other plants at home or take from our compound downstairs or just grow it downstairs and my mom was like "you can test in my cactus pot first if grow then buy a real pot".
I was sad. But my parents are the kindest and sweetest and nicest and bestest inside! and my dad even helped me plant the seeds in the soil (I only germinated them the seeds in wet tissue xD)
Here's a picture of me preparing the 5 seeds for germination teehee (:
Thanks pa and ma for the humongous amount of love, patience and support this trying period of time (: I really wouldn't cope without you both and yall are the pillars of my life (:
Here's cute dad part II!
And here's cute mom and dad part I
Context- mom tried to help dad wear mask and she wore it like:
I have the cutest parents on earth hehehe they take selfies when they go out HEHE
So I think although this world is imperfect and things are bad (I haven't studied for 2 days since ended ytd), there is always something good in everything bad. This, I as a firm believer of imperfection, strongly believe. (which is why I cannot understand/ don't bother about try-hard motivational authors/speakers who only discuss positives or over-cheesy goals in life that don't reflect reality ((mine at least)) or don't sufficiently consider human failure and the imperfection of this world.)
Like friends and family who will never be perfect but we love them for who they are, I feel that this world and society will never be close to perfect. But, I guess we just have to learn to accept the bad with the good and the good with its imperfections, till ultimately we/ I can love this world, this country, this government (thankyou pap!), this school, this family, these friends, this home.
It's not so much about how great our lives are, but rather more about which side of people and this world we choose to look at. Our Choices. And I admit, I tend to/ natural instinct is to notice the bad before the good. But deep inside, I guess i really really love my friends and family and this world no matter what.
(Ew quite gross ok sorry)
At the end of the day, I guess what I wanted to say here was that
I'm always a lucky girl no matter how I feel bout myself- and this is no self pity/ making myself feel better or anything but something my parents constantly remind me with their "What do others have that you don't? Where have they been that you haven't?" Whenever I feel envious of my friends or others who have things that I don't.
This comes even from friends who know me and my inner feelz well enough/ real friends who aren't friends cos of pity or anything. (thanks lyj)
So I guess I'm here to tell myself that I shouldn't always feel so sad about myself or so extremely lousy although I'm extremely far from becoming an ideal human being.
No matter how terrible I am, my parents love me for who I am, and God loves me for who I am too. (He's really created more miracles for me than I could've ever expected and led me through e whole prelims haha thankyou Father)!
So I guess I should learn to do so myself too, and stop basing my worth on meaningless words or superficial world views (even if others do /-: ).
It's not about how much we don't have, but learning to be satisfied with what we actually do.
(五月天's 知足 plays in head haha another fab song that I'm looping a lot recently)
Thankyou if you've read all the way here!
I'm sorry for such a long post and my incessant ranting and if this would take you 3 days to finish reading HAHA but yes I took a few days to draft this post too so I wouldn't be surprised if you were to take as long to read it! I have way too much rubbish in my body sorry haha goodnight!(:
