24/1 ten feet short
Sunday, January 25, 2015 | 1/25/2015 03:13:00 AM | 0 comments
Vvv scared that once I start blogging then like the magic and peace in me now poofs again Or I start to feel more depressed than I actually am/should feel
The weekends are really a blessing
And December will be a miracle
Today was a good day
This week was pretty (or compared to last week, extremely) peaceful (:
I can't believe it's week4 soon:
Cos my gears are still stuck/haven't started and I'm still in the can't-do-any-shit-but-stay-alive mode now
And through pe and many sucky things in school this week, the fact that some people don't even have to try in order to achieve more than your best was pointed out so bluntly in my face
But I will continue tryinggggggggggg
And it's my last week of being 17
A very scary thought when during dinner earlier ashley and fang were telling me to treasure my last year with transport concessions cos after that public transport becomes a luxury
I realized that after we're 18 basically no one cares??? Even if I go bankrupt taking the train which fares everyone who doesn't have concession passes complain about?
Errrmg okay I have enough things on my plate for now will worry about this next year
I need to get out of this 10feet deep well of mine and stop feeling so negative and have such shallow mindsets anymore but
So what if I climb ten feet tall out of this well
I will still only be in the ten feet deep well of others
Hahahaha sigh
"Life is not about comparison. You should only compare w yourself" (oh that irony hahahahaha) but isn't that what everyone basically does twenty four seven (at least since the first second of 2015 or the first year of education in elite schools/2007)
(Now thinking about it I do miss GS primary/ being in a neighbourhood school because what I put in is what I get, there were lesser unfair advantages, people were less complicated, and at the very very least, my maximum effort wouldnt equate to no effort .)
(but then again, am I putting in maximum effort now yet?
Am I even putting in effort
Hahahahahaha)
Okay la amidst it all I can't deny that I've learnt a lot from life and it's made me a disgusting person after 17 years but still alive.
And I wanted to again say Thankyou to the people who are in my life thanks guyss (esp koala) although I don't say it but the little things that people do for me I feel and I remember
It's 3am again
HAHHAHAHA happy new year to studying tmr okay goodnight
