Today was a good day I guess
I mean the events today;
Timekeeping was at first scary and we got scolded I was shaking so badly inside
But then it turned out to be so fun
And knowing our class did well made me so happy and proud despite having a horrible migraine which lasted since then till now
Dinner w YEPMAM was good too I guess, at least for me baa
The cake surprise didnt turn out as well as I wanted it to but it was okay heh
Reminded of why I love these 5 people so much although just a few weeks ago things were so cold and harsh but
Yeah

But maybe it was the picking on by the Best Teacher in the World this morning
who keeps making me feel like shit/ so lousy and ruin my mood so much it affects my learning
Maybe it was the failure even at the first try of timekeeping which got us into trouble
Maybe it was the ugly pics just now
Idk
Suddenly feel so disgusted and sick of myself
Again
So I'm sorry but if you're gonna get angry/pissed then just don't read this ba cos im not expecting any comfort from anyone but neither do I want more judgements/dislike/scolding
Why the heck am I like that

(Content removed)

I know God makes no mistakes in his creations
But I wish I knew what his plans of creating me so imperfectly were.
Maybe his goal was for my imperfections to make others' more perfect hahaha
But why me..

I'm so tired
Yet my level of negativity in the stress vs rest thingum is still much better than many people I know/assume
So I shouldn't complain anymore and just suck it up
Maybe yijie was right, I don't like to face reality
I don't like the harsh and cold reality
I don't

Thankful that tmr's labour day
Finally a day to stop and rest
My migraine is killing me.
Maybe not just migraine.


God, hold me together. let me continue to strive to be better, and learn to accept my imperfections for no one else will.. please grant me more love to love the people around me and spread your love to them, even when their hearts have been shut and deadlocked from their past.
-------------------------------------------

Tonight, let me be in solitude, cos I don't feel like talking to anyone in particular; I'll reply everything tomorrow, I promise. I'm sorry, and thank you for everything although its so awkward and idrk how to reply you yet.
-------------------------------------------

Today was thankfully less awkward. Today I tried and risked with a certain amount of fear and I got through to you; unlike yesterday where your barriers were so high, that i was afraid to go anywhere near. Sometimes idk where the lines really are, that it gets me scared. Cos sometimes when I jump low yet the rope's suddenly high, i'd trip.
---------------------------------------------



Older Post | Newer Post

MiL EniledA.
an average 14-year old;
Wishes come true on 30 Jan;
Taonannite 2006-2009, BiCEPer 2007-2009, NYgirl 2010-2011;
adeline30197@hotmail.com.

Wants.
God. True Friends. Family. Love. Care. Health. Happiness. Simplicity. Peace. Everything to be okay.

Her Thoughts | Her Words | Friends | Friends | Friends

Today was a good day I guess
I mean the events today;
Timekeeping was at first scary and we got scolded I was shaking so badly inside
But then it turned out to be so fun
And knowing our class did well made me so happy and proud despite having a horrible migraine which lasted since then till now
Dinner w YEPMAM was good too I guess, at least for me baa
The cake surprise didnt turn out as well as I wanted it to but it was okay heh
Reminded of why I love these 5 people so much although just a few weeks ago things were so cold and harsh but
Yeah

But maybe it was the picking on by the Best Teacher in the World this morning
who keeps making me feel like shit/ so lousy and ruin my mood so much it affects my learning
Maybe it was the failure even at the first try of timekeeping which got us into trouble
Maybe it was the ugly pics just now
Idk
Suddenly feel so disgusted and sick of myself
Again
So I'm sorry but if you're gonna get angry/pissed then just don't read this ba cos im not expecting any comfort from anyone but neither do I want more judgements/dislike/scolding
Why the heck am I like that

(Content removed)

I know God makes no mistakes in his creations
But I wish I knew what his plans of creating me so imperfectly were.
Maybe his goal was for my imperfections to make others' more perfect hahaha
But why me..

I'm so tired
Yet my level of negativity in the stress vs rest thingum is still much better than many people I know/assume
So I shouldn't complain anymore and just suck it up
Maybe yijie was right, I don't like to face reality
I don't like the harsh and cold reality
I don't

Thankful that tmr's labour day
Finally a day to stop and rest
My migraine is killing me.
Maybe not just migraine.


God, hold me together. let me continue to strive to be better, and learn to accept my imperfections for no one else will.. please grant me more love to love the people around me and spread your love to them, even when their hearts have been shut and deadlocked from their past.
-------------------------------------------

Tonight, let me be in solitude, cos I don't feel like talking to anyone in particular; I'll reply everything tomorrow, I promise. I'm sorry, and thank you for everything although its so awkward and idrk how to reply you yet.
-------------------------------------------

Today was thankfully less awkward. Today I tried and risked with a certain amount of fear and I got through to you; unlike yesterday where your barriers were so high, that i was afraid to go anywhere near. Sometimes idk where the lines really are, that it gets me scared. Cos sometimes when I jump low yet the rope's suddenly high, i'd trip.
---------------------------------------------



Older Post | Newer Post